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Introduction to Cade Posner... a future firefighter
Hey y'all my name is Cade Posner and I am currently a junior here at The University of Oklahoma. I am majoring in Administrative Leadership and minoring in Health and Exercise Science. I plan on graduating at the end of this year (a year early) due to the amount of classes I have been able to fit into my schedule as well as taking summer classes. After graduation I plan on becoming a firefighter back in my home state of California. I am from a town located about twenty minutes outside of Sacramento in Northern California. Aside from school I love spending my time in the outdoors whether it be through sports or just for fun. I am currently a part of the Baseball team here at OU and have been since the beginning of my sophomore year. Growing up in California I was exposed to many outdoor activities such as snowboarding, paddle boarding, kayaking, and hiking at a young age. These activities have stuck with me and during my time spent at home due to the Coronavirus I was able to get
Hello Cade, first off I really like the simplistic aesthetic design of your portfolio. Next, I read the Story A Bond, and I thought you told this story very well. I loved how you changed the story into your own. It was very heart warming. This story was also very realistic, and I enjoyed that. One thing I may have added was how the father became sick or what happened in order for him to pass. Or you could just add some kind of transition from him talking to his father to him dying. Other than that, I thought your story was very good and had a very creative twist on the original story. Keep up the good work and I look forward to reading the rest of your stories!
ReplyDeleteHey Cade,
ReplyDeleteI wanted to start off by saying great job so far! I think your website is very accessible, easy to read and navigate! I wish you had more stories and maybe an introduction so that I can know what to expect right from the start. I think it could also benefit you to choose a title that is more specific to your portfolio theme so that others will know what to expect from the very beginning. I think the story that you have so far is a very good one! I think there are a few grammatical errors that you could benefit from fixing, but other than that you did a great job overall!
Hi Cade :)
ReplyDeleteI really liked your first story. I liked how you titled it "A Bond." It speaks to the obvious father-son bond your write about, but it also speaks to the bond the son had with his family and his future, and it also speaks to all the bonds the father had with the people who showed up for his funeral. The ending honestly reminded me a lot of the ending of the movie "Big Fish," and I really liked that a lot, too.
The way you changed the original story was well done. Instead of the greed and a tired elder, I loved how you showed the core moments of a father-son relationship, and, in the end, left it up to the son.
I do wish there was an intro, so we could know the theme. I'm curious to know if the rest of your stories will be about a bond of some sort, or if it'll focus on a different through thread or key message. Maybe they won't have any relation at all! But it would be helpful to have that introductory page to let us know.
Overall, I think your first story is really good, and I cant wait to read the rest of your stories!
Hey Cade, I really enjoyed reading your story “A Bond”. I think I liked this story so much because after I graduate in May, I plan on becoming a high school football coach. So, I will be a high school teacher here in a few short months. Hopefully I will have the same impact on kids as the example in your story. I’m curious, will you write more about sports in the future, or will your stories be based on different subjects? Looking through your portfolio, I really enjoyed how your page is set up. I really like the picture of the barn at dusk that is the picture on your main page. I am from a small agricultural town, so that made me nostalgic. Overall, I thought you did a very good job retelling this story, and I thought your story flowed very smoothly. Great job Cade, keep it up!
ReplyDeleteHi Cade!
ReplyDeleteI really like the initial photo on the first page of your Portfolio. It really sets a nice mood for the rest of the piece. I would suggest adding in some more photos and colors to your Portfolio though to really make it pop. Adding in an introduction and table of contents on the cover page would be a good idea as well so your readers know what to expect.
I liked your first story. The tale of a son and his encouraging father was super touching. I really liked how it went in stages from the boy's childhood all the way through to adulthood and the passing of his father. I did find myself wanting more details of their relationship though. Like, maybe give us a scene between them on his death bed where you can feel the sadness.
Good work so far! I look forward to seeing where you can take it. Good job.
ReplyDeleteHi cade,
Good job with the first story in your portfolio! Everyone loves a good tug at their heart strings and this was definitely one of those stories. I like how it flowed progressively throughout the boy's life and the formatting itself was almost a roadmap of the boy aging. I also like that you can tell how much the son looked up to his father, although they didn't have emotional connection in the story. the only critique i have in that aspect is maybe you could have gone deeper into the boy's relationship with the father potentially at the beginning of the story.
This week's critiquing is about paragraphing, however, your story was broken up into line styles with few paragraphs. i personally liked the formatting, because the information that needed to be together was grouped together, and the dialogue was separate. good job with this story and good luck with the rest of your semester!
Hi Cade!
ReplyDeleteThe picture on the first page of your portfolio is just magnific. I wish you could add an introduction and a table of contain to your portfolio so we can have an idea of what your portfolio is about. In also would suggest reducing the spacing on your first story, it gives the impression that it's a very long story and gets the reader lazy to read. I like that the dialogue was separate. I enjoy stories that has dialogue, thumbs up for that.
Looking at your story, i like how you showed that the son really looked after the father even tho they didn't have emotional connection. i wish you could go more in details about their relationship. I also got curious on what made his father died. Was he sick? Can you tell a little bit more about it? Overall good story. Can't wait to read the next one and see how your portfolio will turn out.
Cade,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I very much enjoyed the outline of the website and how it is easy to navigate. Also, I would like to add that you have a beautiful background picture, and it sets up a lot of the aspects of the stories that are presented in your portfolio! Reading your first story, A Bond, I was very touched by the way you described the plot and the effect that the father had on him throughout the main character's life. It seems like a whole lifetime that you described in a small story such as this! Something I would add to the story page itself is the addition of background color or anything else in addition to the picture.
Cade, I really enjoyed reading through tour website and the stories on there. The one that really stuck out to me was the story if the boy and his father. I am very close to my father so I understand the special bond that exists between these two family members. A son becomes the man that he sees his father as and wants to mimic his actions so that the can make his dad proud. It was sad to read about how the son had to see his dad die but speaking to him gave him strength about what the could do with his life. The second story of the coyote and eagle coming together was also interesting because it had very real world applications. Our country can learn from this story of teamwork to come together and not let our differences divide us. Even though we may not agree on everything, we can work together towards a common cause.
ReplyDeleteHi Cade! I read through both stories on your portfolio. First, I really liked the simple yet beautiful photo of a little country home on your home page. It makes the portfolio feel very homey and warm, almost like I am about to read a very safe and happy story. Next, when I actually began to read what you wrote, I noticed that you like to include a lot of dialogue within your writing. Personally, I love this style of telling a story! It enables readers to see who the person is by the way they talk and treat others around them. I would have liked to see a little more detail between the dialogue, but overall I really enjoyed these writings. I also liked that at the end of both stories, a lesson seemed to be learned. These characters were not just experiencing events for the fun of it! Anyways, I really liked what you wrote on your portfolio, keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteHi Cade,
ReplyDeleteThe photo on your home page of the farm house and the sunset is so pretty! It immediately made me wonder what your stories will be about. The first story, A Bond, was so beautiful. It is very true, teachers make a huge impact on their students lives, as do parents when they are supportive of their children. This story made me be very thankful of my parents because they are constantly there to support me and all of my dreams. I also relate to the boy, always having dreams and goals in mind but then worried about finding a job to sustain myself and a future family. I think a lot of us in college go through this. The second story really showed the importance of working together! Nothing is better than having you and another other person complete a goal and being thankful to have each other while doing it.